I Thessalonians 4:13-14
Today, January 29, 2012, marks the 10th year that my beloved husband left this world to enter his eternal home. I never much cared for the month of January; I mean the weather is usually gray, cold and dismal. Plus with all the celebrations of Christmas, January has a hard act to follow. But for the past 10 years there has been another reason I did not care much for this month, it reminded me of my husband’s illness and his passing.
But this year I have chosen not to dwell on what was the sadness of January. I have chosen to think on the good things…the “whatsoevers Paul talks about in the book of Philippian: “Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.” Philippians 4:8
Has it been an easy transition? “No!” But it is do-able with God’s help. I have learned lots of things these past years and one of them is: grieving is a process that takes most of us a lot longer than we want it to. But the key to the healing is to take it at your own pace, whether that is one day or one second at a time. Another thing I have learned is: there are lots of people out there that are hurting. I believe that I have more compassion and sensitivity towards others that are grieving for whatever reason. So I must move on, not wallow in self-pity. There are many that need encouragement and yes… hugs.
I’m not the same person I was before January 29, 2002. It has been a long, slow and sometimes excruciating process. But this one thing I KNOW, God has been with me every step of the way. NEVER have I felt He had deserted me. He has been by my side teaching me things I thought I could never do, encouraging me to put one foot in front of the other and move on and yes comforting me when no human could do so. Yes! God is real! And He loves us with an everlasting love!
When those close to me say “You have changed” I am thankful that they see the work God has done in me. I am grateful that I did not allow myself to succumb to the grief that tried to overtake me. I am grateful that I …”do not grieve as those who have no hope…” The HOPE is Jesus; He is our all in all. He wants us to come to Him with our hurts, our sorrow, and our pain. He will comfort and make us whole again.
It is a nice bright sun-shiny day today, unlike the “normal” January days. Thank You Lord!
(pictures taken by my son @Laguna Beach California 2008)