Wednesday, December 24, 2008

New beginnings!

I am ashame that I have not posted on this site in so long...I will not bother to give an excuse...just laziness and I have been busy. It's hard to believe that it has been almost a year since I started this blog. Last year I believed that the Lord had given me the desire to have more wisdom and understanding, thus the name of this blog. And He was so faithful in leading and guiding me to obtain those two things. Many opportunities came when I had to exercise the "wisdom" that I have gained since serving the Lord and many situations came when He helped me to use my "understanding".

I have found that "wisdom" is actually using the knowledge that God has already given you. And "understanding" is allowing Him through His Holy Spirit to direct your thoughts, opinions and your will. I have learned how to just let some things go but also how to pursue some things and to stand my ground.

It will soon be 7 years since my husband passed , since I began on this journey. I had no idea who I was, or where I was going. The pain and loneliness was at times unbearable. But in many ways I am no longer that same person. With God's help, I have changed. I still get lonely, but i know with assurance that I am not alone. I still don't like making major decisions, but I do it, even if I do it scared. And trust the Lord to help me with the outcome. I still have times of anxiety and worry, but I press in and remember that the Lord is at my side.

Thank you Lord for helping me to change. You know that my deepest desire is to become better for You. Help me to continue to keep my eyes on you and to covet your leading in my life.

As I sit here writing I am on the West coast visiting my family. I also have a new friend, the family cat. He sits with me as I talk to the Lord in the early hours of morning. The cat sits close to share my warmth and he is content. I don't particularly like cats, but this one is "growing" on me. So you see I am still learning, maybe cats aren't so bad after all.

With the new year comes a time for new beginnings. My prayer is that God will continue to help us to be all we can be in Him. With 2009 comes the opportunity to do just that.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Like deer feet...

It is God who arms me with strength, and makes my way perfect.He makes my feet like the feet of deer, and sets me on my high places.
Psalms 18:32-33


God never ceases to amaze me! This morning at dawn, I went outside to pickup a phone book that was delivered at the end of my driveway. For the past few days it has been very rainy and dreary, the kind of weather that makes you only want to be inside the house. But this morning with promises of a clearer day, as an early riser, I ventured out to pick up the phonebook now probably sodden with all that rain. (I really wish that the phonebook and newspaper delivery persons would either aim higher or come to the door like they are suppose to when leaving their goods, but that’s another story for another time)

As I was walking down the driveway I spotted him, I say him for sure because on his beautiful head he wore antlers, I would say he was not that old because though the antlers were big, they were not massive as some I have seen. There he stood in all his regality, stopped in his tracks and looking at me. I’m speaking of a deer, in my neighbor hood! In fact this is the third time that I had a sighting, always in that same spot, a few hundred feet from me, right on the end of my street. The sightings before, it was dark, there was more than one and I did not have a clear view, but today! I saw him and he saw me.

We made eye contact and I was afraid to move less I startled him to run away, but he did not. So for about 10 seconds we stood there, him checking me out and me afraid to breathe, not wanting to spoil this moment of coming face to face with one of God’s beautiful creations. I slowly bent to pick up the phonebook and when I turned my head for that split second, when I looked up again he had turned and was running off in the direction of the small wooded area behind my neighbor’s house. The last I saw of him was the white underside of his bobtail and his hind feet running with precision and agility that only God could give him and without one sound.

I was the only one out this time of morning, the only human that is. There was not a sound, and the sun had not fully arisen, making the autumn sky a pinkish hue. I stood in my pjs in the brisk early morning air and savored the moment that God had just allowed me to experienced. To some it may seem stupid making a big deal over a deer, but in this life that God has blessed me with, I have learned to appreciate every single moment. And this moment I was reminded of how God will make our feet like the feet of a deer, and with His help, making us to go to high places and to run this race of life as effortless and as agile as what I just saw.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Humbling...

Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
I Peter 5:6-7

It is a humbling thing to be humbled. Today was one of those times. Duties that I had taken pride in doing for a very long time have been taken away from me. As I sat and listened to the people that are responsible now for those same duties, I began to think that all my hard work had gone in vain. Spending extra time, taking work home and even checking and double-checking to make sure each detail was perfect, now seemed like some big joke. And the joke was on me!

Did I think that I was indispensable, that no one could perform like me? I thought that I had the right motive…to do a good job without expecting any recognition. But as the Lord began to gently speak to my heart, I began to see that my motives were not a pure as I thought they were. As I submitted to the fact that life goes on and God is the one that order my steps, I began to feel a layer of “self” began to peel away. My feelings were first very vulnerable, feeling exposed, then pity for myself, and then a total revelation of the fact that I am nothing and can do nothing with out God. What a relief that was!
With each piece of me that I lay down, I can “pick up” more of Him.

Monday, October 6, 2008

Neither sleep nor slumber...

Indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.
he LORD watches over you— the LORD is your shade at your right hand;
the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night.
The LORD will keep you from all harm— he will watch over your life;
the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.
Psalms 121: 4-8

I had a rough day yesterday, started to worry about things that I really should not. But the feelings became just like a roller coaster. First a wave of worry, then doubt, then fear, then self pity was in hot pursuit. I felt like I was spinning out of control! And here I thought I was such a secure person…but it happened.

Finally I called my younger sister and asked her to pray for me. I know it was the right thing to do. Because as she prayed it was like a soft warm blanket fell upon me, shutting out all the worry, fear and anxiety that I felt. And yes, even the loneliness that tried to overtake me began to go away.

By the time she had finished praying and speaking words of encouragement over me, I felt like a new person. And when I went to bed at night I slipped naturally into a deep relaxing sleep.
I thank God for His servants (in my case it was my younger sister), that can be there for us when we need a shoulder to lean on or a hand to lift us up. I thank God that I was able to sleep peacefully…after all He never sleeps nor slumbers and is watching over us….

Friday, October 3, 2008

Take Time !

Great is the LORD and most worthy of praise; His greatness no one can fathom.
One generation will commend your works to another; they will tell of your mighty acts.
They will speak of the glorious splendor of your majesty, and I will meditate on your wonderful works. They will tell of the power of your awesome works, and I will proclaim your great deeds.
Psalms 145:3-6

As I was walking into work this morning I looked up at the sky and saw the most beautifu lsight I have ever seen! Whites clouds like lace with a pink shimmering border! This against a blue sky was something to behold! I stopped and stared up at this awesome sight. I did not care who was watching me as I took in the beauty of God’s handiwork!

Lately, I have really taken the time to “smell the roses”. We are all in such a rush most times, and what we are rushing to, will be there when we get there! We miss out on so much in life by flying by blindly to accomplish something that doesn’t really matter in the whole scope of things. And God has so many little “delights’ He want to share with us.

Take time, take time to give a smile, to coo over a baby, to read a good book. Take time to observe the beauty of God’s handiwork in nature, especially this time of year. Take time to thank Him for the glorious splendor of His majesty!

Thursday, October 2, 2008

In rememberance...

Happy Birthday Ma!
Today is October 2nd, your birthday. If you were still on this earth you would be 85 years old! And I’m willing to bet that if you were here you would still be the good looking, well dressed woman that you always were.

Can I tell you… I miss you Ma. I miss our Saturday morning talks, how we would laugh! I’m sitting here at work and wondering how I have made it without having you to talk to. So much has happened since you’ve gone. First of all I have 2 grandchildren now and I know how you felt when I used to visit with my son (your grandson). I remember how you would spoil him and treat him so special. Guess what? Now I understand, because now I know how special it is to have grandchildren and what a special love God gives us just for them.

Ma, you know already that Larry passed away, so I know how you felt when Da died. If I had known then like I know now, I would have called you more, because I know how lonely it can get sometimes. I would have paid more attention when you talked about Da, because now I know how much it means to be able to just talk about the man that was part of your life for such a long time. And Ma… I would have kissed and hugged you more, if I had known you would be leaving us.

I know that where you are right now you are in such splendor that even the best of what you experienced on this earth could never compare. I believe that you have been re-united with Da and your own mother, what a wonderful joy that must have been! And I also believe that you remember me and all of us that you loved here on earth.

You poured so much of yourself into us Ma, sometimes I even look in the mirror and catch a glimpse of you. Rather it be a phrase I say or a body movement I do, there you are! I've even inherited your love of sending greeting cards. Like you, I have a fun time picking out just the right card for someone. You will forever be a part of my life and in my heart. And I say thank you for all you’ve done for me

You always used to say “He says that He will never leave us nor forsake us”. And it is so true. I am so grateful that you knew God so personally and had the assurance that He was with you, just as you are with Him right now.

Happy Birthday Ma, I love you! I’m sending lots of kisses and I pray that some how, some way the Lord will let you know how much you are missed and loved.
Your daughter,Roni

Monday, September 29, 2008

Autumn Thoughts...

“Delight yourself also in the LORD, and He shall give you the desires of your heart.”
Psalms 37:4

There is nothing better than a very relaxing day, doing what you really enjoy doing. The older I get the more I am learning how to just relax and let those times just happen. Yesterday was one of those days.

After checking out the prices of replacing my double storm doors; I decided that it would be better for my pocketbook if I just slap on a couple of layers of paint and put on some new hardware. And Voila! I must say my front entrance look fabulous! (That is if you don’t look too hard and see the drops of paint that missed the doors). So with “new” doors, it was time to decorate. Decorating for each season is my most favorite thing to do, other than eating a Hershey’s Special dark chocolate bar, but that’s a whole other subject.

Since I am in decorating mode, I might as well make it an event so I start a big pot of Vegetable beef soup in the crock pot; nothing like soup to warm up a chilly, rainy day. While the soup is simmering, I drag out my box of autumn decorations from the garage. Has it really been a whole year since I stored this box, my how time flies! When I open the box I am delighted to see the ceramic pumpkins, silk fall leaves and mums, they are like old friends welcoming me to a new season, my favorite one by the way. And this year I have two new friends, Mr. & Mrs. Scarecrow! I usually don’t decorate with Scarecrows but I adopted this “couple “while on a trip last fall to Virginia to visit my sister. She and I went to a grocery store and right at the front entrance was a shopping cart filled with scarecrows at 75% off! Now you know I cannot pass up a bargain, so we grabbed a few and they have been in my garage for almost a year now awaiting their entrance into society. So they (one male and one female scarecrow) have the honored position of their very own corner on my front porch with a large orange mum in between. I must admit they do look kind of cute standing there. A fall wreath on each door and pillows with a leaf motif in each chair and it’s done! I would love to use real pumpkins and Indian corn in my decorating outside but I’ve learned my lesson; the pumpkins rot really fast in the sun and the squirrels have a feast with the corn, totally disgusting. I have bad memories of sagging, smelly pumpkins and Indian corn with missing kernels!
But with what I have used, I stand back and admire my handiwork and it looks pretty good. I can smell the soup so I know it is time to go in and stir.

Within the next 2 hours I have decorated the foyer, an area in the kitchen and made arrangements for the kitchen and dining room tables. I’m actually tired, but enjoyed every minute of it! Those are the kind of days that I thank God for. Someone else may think it’s crazy to spend that much time and energy in something that someone else may not even notice. But it makes me happy and that is my satisfaction. To spend a peaceful day decorating for my most favorite time of the year with a pot of soup simmering in the crock pot on a chilly, rainy day, in the words of Martha Stewart “That’s a good thing.”

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

My Help

Surely God is my help; the Lord is the one who sustains me. Psalms 54:4

I really enjoy my drive to work, most mornings that is. I put on my worship music and enjoy my 20 minute ride through the country side. On occasions I do have to dodge the driver that dangerously weaves in and out of traffic or the elderly person that gets in front of you and drives abut 10 miles and hour, but most times I have a peaceful drive in. This morning I enjoyed the beginnings of the autumn season. Fields that once were brimming with green corn stalks are now turning to brown. Fields of green produce are now turning to shades of gold. Flocks and flocks of geese trying desperately to make their V formation. I don’t know if they are actually flying south this early or rehearsing for the real thing. I say this because I notice that a few of the geese are having a hard time getting in “line” behind the leader, it makes me laugh. Fall is in the air, you can sense it, and there is a definite change in the season. Even the summer flowers that bloomed profusely are now beginning to fade. It’s a gradual process, but change is coming.

I was thinking the other day how it has been almost 10 years since my late husband’s illness caused him to be admitted to the hospital for an extended amount of time. I remember coming home from Philadelphia and entering the house alone. For the first time in our married life I was alone in the house at night. We had gone mostly everywhere together and this was so foreign to me. I kneeled down by the couch and cried out to God in my fear and frustration. It was the first time in my life of being totally alone. With God’s help I was able to get through that season of my life. I would not want to repeat that scenario and yet as I look back now I can see God was with me all the time.
Through every fear, every disappointment and sadness, He was there, like the poem “Footprints” so beautifully describes how He not only walked beside me, but at times He carried me.

There is a woman in my office that after many years of marriage, she and her husband are experiencing a sort of “Second Honeymoon”. I listen to her everyday as she talks about how wonderful it is to be in love and how they are enjoying themselves as a couple at this season in their marriage. I must be honest, I listen and smile at the right times, I am truly happy for her, but when I am alone I mourn and ask God “How come…?” But I know that He is with me, He is my help and I will be fine.

I marvel at how He has brought me such a long way. The change was gradual, but it came never the less. As I remember back when I was weeping face down on that couch, wondering how I would make it, and all that followed afterwards; now I am amazed of His Love and patience with me, how He so lovingly is taking me through this journey. He alone is my help; He is the one that sustains me. He is the One that makes life worth living, and I give Him all the glory!

Hopefully, now I am a little stronger, a little wiser and understand the depth and endurance of His Love a little more.

Season after season God will help us and keep us as we look to Him.

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Babies! Babies!

Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb is a reward. Psalms 127:3

There are babies being born in my family and it is so precious…they are so precious! My sweet little grand–nieces and nephew, all three born within a year or so. I look at their sweet perfect little faces and I cannot help but praise God for His goodness and miracle working power.

I think that in these days we have taken the birthing process for granted. Millions of babies are aborted every minute around the world, I believe that the thinking about birth has cooled down to a “Ho-hum “ experience. When the birth of every child is a miracle within itself.

The Bible says that children are a heritage from the Lord. God is giving us a legacy and we know that every gift from God is good. God is saying to us “here is a gift to see yourself go on to another generation”. Though my son is grown, every time I look at him I see his father, even his grandfather and I also see me. And now that he has is own children I continue to see the resemblance go on and on. Recently I took a picture of my 7-year-old granddaughter holding a cup of tea looking up into the camera. When I first looked at it, it startled me to see the resemblance to her grandfather (my late husband) in a similar pose. But now when I look at it, it is a comfort to know that the legacy goes on, though my husband is not with us, she is the part of him that will go on.

What a blessing it is to welcome a little one into our world and to rejoice that we have an opportunity to participate in their lives. To see with our own eyes the miracle that God has given to us. To celebrate in the heritage that God has given us!

Sunday, August 31, 2008

Do it for Him

And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him. Colossians 3:17


Sitting a the dining room table having my devotions, I began to feel a little sorry for myself as I thought, “Is this it Lord?” Is this what my life is suppose to be like?”
I am 57 years old and my exciting weekend amount to visiting the nursing home to hear my 81-year-old friend give me an update on the consistency of her bowels and how often she moves them? I began to laugh and cry at the same time, ever did that? Cry because of the pathetic-ness of it and laugh because it IS funny! I don’t mind visiting the home it’s just that it was not part of my “plans” so many years ago...

Let me go back a bit, back when I thought I was in the full fledge of life. My late husband and I had lots of “friends” and we were busy most nights of the week. We were involved in ministries that required meetings. So when were not out doing the ministry, we were in the meetings about the ministries. And weekends for me involved weddings, funerals, women’s conferences, etc, etc. I felt like I was really in the “swing of things.” Doing God’s work and loving it. I felt like I belonged to an exclusive society of people that just didn’t sit back and let life happen, but was busy doing things that made life happen (make sense?).

Now with many life changes and a little more wisdom, thanks to God, His patience and love, I see things differently now. Sometimes I still wonder why I end up going to the nursing home or why when it seems no one else cares I end up listening to the hurting person that no one has time for. To be honest, sometimes I wonder why the things that I desire but do not get, I seem to give…freely. But who said that life is fair? So even though I may feel that somehow I have been handed a raw deal, I have to trust and believe that if God knows all about it, then He will reward me in HIS way. My responsibility is to do what I do unto Him and not do it to satisfy man and that includes myself. And to give thanks of course. Even though I may say to myself “If I hear about her bowel movements one more time…” I must remember “do it for Him’

After all Jesus, came and walked among prostitutes, criminals, lepers, spent time with them. I’m sure His position in heaven was much more illustrious than how He lived on earth. He exchanged streets of gold for the dirty dusty roads of Jerusalem. He exchanged angelic choirs singing “Holy, Holy” for the cries of the sick, blind and lame calling out to Him to heal them. But most of all He exchanged His pure life for my sinful one. So how can I not “do it for Him”?

Friday, August 8, 2008

Grandma's feet

For You formed my inward parts; You covered me in my mother’s womb. Psalms 139:13

Ever since I was a child my feet have been the subject of many complaints by me, embarrassment and jokes. Now don’t get me wrong I’m very thankful for my feet, how does the saying go “I once complained because I had no shoes, until I met a man that had no feet”? So really I am grateful to have feet and be able to walk! Thank you Lord! But because the Lord chose to make my feet unique (ahem) putting it mildly, I never chose to wear shoes with the toes out.

I am a confessed shoe lover and always admire people who are able to wear their toes out and painted with those cute little open toe shoes (sigh). Things dreams are made of, for me. When shopping I pass over those shoes and head for the closed toe ones. I do venture to wear a “mule” (shoe with the heel out) and have lots of those. But I never had the nerve to actually wear a classy open toe shoes for fear of hearing gasps from anyone in public who would get a glimpse of my short stubby toes!

The few pair of sandals that I have don’t count because those are designated only for wearing to a quick run to the grocery store or errand. They kind of fall in the category with the ugly scarf I wear over my rollers when I have to make a dash run, it’s not really a part of your wardrobe; but come in handy when you have something to do and know no one will recognize you, or care to with you looking like THAT! Except that one time in the drugstore, I was in my “incognito” outfit and this woman I had not seen in a while called my name out really loud and came over to have what turned out to be a conversation for about 45 minutes! I tried really hard to cover my toes and head as each person came through the doors. I guess it worked because I didn’t hear any gasps. Only I could have sworn the lady I was talking to, her eyes kept looking down…

Anyway, my feet, I was looking at them the other day and it came to me…you have feet like your Grandma Reed! Ha! That’s it! You mean God didn’t make a mistake, maybe looked away for a second when He was forming me? No! my feet aren’t a mistake! I have my Grandma’s feet and what an honor that is!
Grandma Reed lived to be 102 years old and during her lifetime she proved that she was a strong, resilient faith-filled woman! She was a woman that had a hard life but always spoke positively and had a laugh! AND she loved pretty shoes. The last time I saw her alive, she was unable to get around on her own but she was admiring my youngest sister’s shiny shoes! Oh Grandma, God saw fit to give me feet like yours, feet I never heard you complain about, feet that took you through life, through the good and bad times and now on to heaven! Where you are dancing before God’s throne! I am blessed to have my feet and you know what? Open toed shoes here I come…I believe Grandma would’ve approved!

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Something New

See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland. Isaiah 43:19

I heard a song the other day as I was lying in bed listening to the Worship channel on TV. It took me back to a time when my little family was intact. By that I mean that my husband was alive and healthy, my son was a child and I was a full time homemaker loving every minute of it.
It was a time of great joy for me because I love that family thing. And as I lay there I could see us three back then, in church singing the song that I heard on TV, with Sunday dinner waiting for us at home. It was almost a ritual, we would go to Sunday morning service come home and eat dinner then take a nice afternoon nap. We were living the life and I was happy. What a time of peace and tranquilty it was back then. We knew that God was blessing us and though things were not perfect, everything seemed normal and it was a comfortable lifestyle.

As I listened to that song I began to yearn for those times again, times when I laughed and smiled with such ease, times when a simple trip to the supermarket made me feel like I was Susie Homemaker and all was right in my world. It was a great time. I yearned for it again...

Until...a still small voice spoke in my heart "You cannot have that again, but you can have something new." Don't let anyone fool you, "letting go" is a hard job, but you can't have something new until you let go of the old. My sister-in-law said something to me right after my husband died "He's not coming back" she said. I don't think she realized that at the time she said that to me I was still numb from the shock of his passing. It was a long time later as I entered into another phase of grief that I was able to begin to understand what she was saying.
My son is a grown man now with a family of his own, he is no longer the child I saw in my memories of a happier time. My son is a wonderful husband and father and I am very proud of him. And though I am no longer a homemaker, I love doing what I do, working in a school.

I can't bring back the "happy" times, but I can go forward. I can be thankful and grateful that God allowed me to experience those "happy" times. I thank God for keeping me these past years, how He is teaching me a "new normal". I can do things now that I never thought I would be able to do. sometimes learning new things are easy but sometimes I just have to climb the tree, go out on a limb and start sawing, believing that God will be there to catch me!

I will always cherish the sweet memories of my past, but I now look forward for the new things that God has for me.

Sunday, June 29, 2008

What is in your hand?

Pass me not, O gentle Savior, hear my humble cry,
While on others Thou art calling, do not pass me by.

Chorus
Savior, Savior, hear my humble cry:
While on others Thou art calling, do not pass me by.

Let me at Thy throne of mercy, find a sweet relief;
kneeling there in deep contrition, help my unbelief.

Trusting only in Thy merit, would I seek Thy face.
Heal my wounded, broken spirit, save me by Thy grace.

Chorus
Savior, Savior, hear my humble cry:
While on others Thou art calling, do not pass me by.

Frances Jane Crosby or Franny Crosby as she is well known is the writer of this famous hymn. This prolific lyricist was born into a poor family. Then as an infant she contracted a cold with inflammation in her eyes, the local doctor was not available so the man who came to treat her prescribed a treatment that ended up being a botched procedure that resulted in her permanent blindness. She never knew her father who died when she was one year old. Her mother and grandmother raised her and not only was it tough being blind, but being raised by women in a society at that time was not easy. In spite of all that would have caused some people to give up and throw in the towel, Fanny persevered, was educated and later married only to have her only child die in infancy.

But she believed in what she wrote. “Pass me not O gentle Savior” was written at one of her trials in life. Here was a woman that had every right to say “Why me Lord?” and perhaps she did at times. And yet she was able to pour her heart out in lyrics that would speak and minister to the hearts of men and women over a hundred years later. Here was a woman who became a lobbyist in Washington DC for the support of education for the blind.

Fanny Crosby a blind woman did not let her handicap stop her from fulfilling God’s purpose in her life. She could not use her eyes, so she used her mind. A mind so anointed by God that she would have as many as twelve hymns in her mind at a time, then dictating them one after the other for someone to write them down on paper.

In Exodus chapter 4, when Moses express some doubt when God told him that He was going to use him to free His people; God asked Moses “What is in your hand?” and Moses answered “A staff.” And we all know how God used what was in the hand of Moses. It was all he had, but it was all God needed. Fanny Crosby gave God all she had and He used it to reach the world.

What do you have? It may seem to you as nothing much. You may say, but you don’t know all that I have been through…give it to God…that’s right, all of it and trust Him to use it for His Glory!

Sunday, June 22, 2008

The child within us

But Jesus called the children to him and said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it."
Luke 18:16-17

God is all about “balance”, as much as He wants us to “grow up” and mature in stature as well as wisdom; He also wants us to have the simple faith and trust of a child. Notice I said simple not silly…there’s a difference. Simple faith and trust as in free, unrestrained, without complication and with willingness.

The last six years of my life has been a journey. Since my husband’s death I’ve had to get to know me all over again. It was time for me to “grow up” about a lot of things. And God took me by the hand and lead me (He’s still leading) through some times that were very somber, sobering and enlightening. But the lyrics to the song “Through it all” the chorus rings very true “I’ve learned to trust in Jesus, I’ve learned to trust in God.”

Now don’t get me wrong, through all this learning and stuff I’ve had some good times too. I mean I’m God’s daughter and He loves me and wants me to enjoy life! He doesn’t want me to be so serious that I miss all the joy He has for me too. (See there’s that balance thing again) A couple of days ago were one of those times.

A lovely friend of mine (she is also a co-worker) took me for a spin in her new sporty convertible. We joked about being “Thelma and Louise” as we put on our sunglasses, and took several minutes to figure out how to get the top down on the car. But once we got rolling it was fun all the way. Now grant it we were only going into town to pick up lunches for the office crew, but to me I felt like a kid again going for a ride down the streets of my hometown in the Homecoming parade!

And what happens when you’re feeling free and having fun in a convertible…well the next thing I know my arms go up and I’m waving and saying hello to people on the street (people we knew of course). Well what do you expect? We had our sunglasses on, our hair was blowing in the wind and we were two hot chicks…okay… two middle-aged hot chicks in a sweet convertible. I was a kid again and it felt wonderful! Did I feel God smiling? I was free, unrestrained, not complicated and willing to have some fun!

Yesterday I was chuckling to myself as I thought of this event. I reflected again how much God wants us to enjoy life and “lighten up” sometimes. God loves us and He loves the child within all of us. Me, I was a child that loved climbing trees so high I could feel the wind in my face and wearing my favorite cut off denim jeans (my mom used to have to trick me to get them in the laundry).

The trials and tribulations of life help us to mature and grow up, but when you think about it we still are children at heart. Sometimes we have buried that “child” so deep, only God can reveal and restore it again. And oh how He wants us to have that simple faith and trust in Him again.

Yes, I had a good laugh on my way to the library yesterday as I was thinking of all this about the child within us. Because I happen to look down at what I was wearing and guess what it was? I had on cut off denim jeans; they are STILL my most favorite thing to wear! I laughed all the way to the library!

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Soooooooo Big!

Oh, magnify the LORD with me, and let us exalt His name together.
Psalms 34:3

Magnify – to increase the apparent size; to make greater than. To intensify; make larger.

The Psalmist knew what he was talking about when in his excitement he said “Oh! Magnify the Lord with me! Trouble was a very familiar thing to David. Even when he became King he still had many troubles and yet he knew the secret of worshipping God!
He knew how to make God bigger than his problem.

Have you ever watch an ant carrying food to his abode? In most cases what is a crumb to us is larger than his entire body! Yet the size of that crumb does not deter that ant from staying focused on the task at hand. No matter the size of its “burden” the ant through divine instinct can bypass what it sees as a problem and fulfill its purpose.

When we have difficulties in life we may look at them as being insurmountable burdens that are too big to fix or carry, when in God’s eyes they look like crumbs! I thank Him for His mercy and grace that understands that we are but pitiful weaklings capable of doing nothing without Him. But as we worship Him and make Him bigger than the trial we may be going through, our burden becomes lighter, easier. God is so big, so awesome; we really cannot fathom His greatness. We can only worship Him and get a mere glimpse of how much bigger He is than our problems.

Friday, June 6, 2008

Our refuge

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Psalms 46:1

Many years ago I was a leader with the Teen ministry where I attended church at the time. We sometimes had between 200-300 teens all in one building at a time. One of the songs we used to sing was :
"God is my refuge and God is my strength, a very present help in trouble.
God is my refuge and God is my strength a very present help in trouble. Therefore I will not fear though the earth be removed.And though the mountains fall and be cast into the sea!"

I can stiil hear all those voices singing out now, some sincere, some not so sincere, but it was a joyous sound to behold. We were declaring God's Awesome power! Man! that must make Him feel good!

It's funny how things can come back to you just when you need it. I have not sung that song in so many years I can't even remember and yet! The other day when I was trying to have a pity party and was doing a really good job of it, that song came back to me full force! I remembered every single word!

God is my refuge AND my strength, then why the heck am I looking to get it from anyone or anything else???????? AAHHH Lord you must get a good laugh from us...a lot!

So, I start singing this song right? And guess what? The words kicked in and it was like I could not stop singing it! LOL Even when I stopped the song was still playing in my head! LOL
God is a PRESENT help, in others words He is right there when you need Him. It may not feel like it all the time, but He says He's there and I believe Him.

Thank you Lord for your mercy, love, help and strength just when I need it!

Sunday, June 1, 2008

Be still...

Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!
Psalms 46:10

I’m a “thinker” (someone who is always trying to analyze an action, deed or person). While it has it good points, I know that I have missed many moments of plain ‘ol fun because I was too busy trying to figure it out. How many times have my late husband, co-workers and friends tried to surprise me and I would not let them because I was too busy trying to “figure” it all out! Basically I don’t like surprises and am a person that likes to be prepared. Like the time I took my car to the mechanic and asked him could he fix a certain thing on my car that I thought was soon due for maintenance. After reluctantly checking it he looked at me and said “M’am I can’t fix it unless it broken.” He then gave me a smile with pity in his eyes, as if to say “Lady you’re crazy!”

I guess in my own pityful, tired little way I think that I can avoid life's surprises by "headin' them off at the pass". And from someone (me) that has had a whole lot of surprises in this life I should know better!

For the past couple of years I have felt strongly that the Lord was calling me to sit and learn from Him. Every since my salvation experience about 30 years ago, from the very beginning I was busy doing what I considered for the Lord. So, so busy. Working in the prison ministry, which I loved! Visiting nursing homes, detention homes and individual homes. Involvement in music ministry, which included singing not only in various churches, musical productions, but street corners and lots and lots of funerals and weddings. I was so committed to what I called “serving the Lord” that I missed my parent’s (that are now both deceased) 50th Wedding anniversary! Oh how sorry I am about that! But at the time I was involved in an Easter Musical production and though we saw many hundreds maybe thousands pray and accept the Lord as Savior and become Christians, it cannot excuse my absence at a celebration for the two people that loved me more than anyone on this earth.

After all that busy-ness and running for the Lord, I am learning to relax and enjoy Him. It is not easy sometimes though, since I like being prepared, sometimes I feel like I don’t know what is happening one minute from the next. I am learning to live one day at a time, sometimes one minute at a time. And though it may seem that I am not doing anything for the Lord, in fact I feel closer to Him than I ever have all these years. I know that I have a purpose in this life and though each season may be different, I desire to walk in His will. Sometimes I want answers right then, “Lord, what do I do now?” “Where do I go now?” But I have to learn how to really let go and release it all to Him.

Sometimes you can’t always be prepared, you just have to be STILL and KNOW that He is God!

Thursday, May 22, 2008

His ways are higher

For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:9


What’s the difference between a skyscraper and a star? One was built by man and the other was God made. When man makes something, no matter how magnificent it may seem to be, it still has that element of being “man-made”. In other words there is always a blueprint or instructions on how they (man) went about making it. On the other hand, when something has been made by God, you just can’t quite explain it. For example if you go to a florist, she or he can tell you in great detail on how they made an arrangement, how the flowers were flown in from some exotic country, and placed and wired just so to make a magnificent masterpiece. But that same florist cannot tell you how to make one flower!

In my conversations with God lately, I have been asking Him about some things. Questions if you will about some things that have transpired in my life. I don’t resort to crying and blubbering “Why God? Why?” But I do ask, after all He is my Father. I am always amused when I hear people say “We should never question God.” And for a while in my life I lived under that fear. But I have found as I tread this sod (Oh! I sound so wise don’t I?), that the closer I get to God the more comfortable I feel asking Him about stuff, about life.

Some of the things that I have asked Him about, I don’t seem to get an answer, but in truth I know that God always gives an answer. His silence is just that…no answer is required. “I AM GOD…trust me.” Moses at the burning bush was told by God that he (Moses) would have to return to Egypt to free His people. Moses asked nervously “And who shall I say has sent me?” God simply replied, “I AM that I AM…” I’m God Moses, trust me. No need for a whole lot of explanations, just I am God…I got this!

Just as I cannot explain how to make something as simple as a flower or a star; I cannot explain some things that have gone on in my life.

And you know what? Some of our problems are "man-made", we can actually bring things on ourselves, but then there are those things that happen and you think "God I thought I did things right." and you just can't undertand why it had to work out that way. Well if God allows it then He knew about it before I was even born. With that in mind I have to trust Him…for His ways are higher than my ways and His thoughts are higher than my thoughts!

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

No other gods...

Thou shall have no other gods before me.
Genesis 20:3


My kindergarten through 2nd grade of schooling was in the parochial system. My older siblings and I attended a Catholic school and received an excellent education along with support of moral beliefs and values that we received at home. When I entered my 3rd grade year I began to attend public school. Now this is surely giving away my age, but I clearly remember having a copy of the Ten Commandments in all of my classes. Even in my 12th grade year, along with a copy of the Constitution there was a copy of the Ten Commandments in full view.

Teachers would often reference the Ten Commandments in their lectures. When I think back now, it was such a part of our lives then, we sort of took it for granted that it would always be that way.

Fast forward to today, where it is a crime to have any kind of “religious” display or teaching in the public school system. If you talk to most students they have no idea who Moses was, or even Noah and the Ark. We have gotten so far away from the teachings of the “Good Book”…NO; we have gotten so far from God, that it’s scary!

Not just in the “World” but in the church as well. It isn’t a few days go by that I don’t read of another fallen pastor/church leader. And they are falling like dominoes! Things like infidelity, extortion of church funds, drunkenness, and spousal abuse are some of the issues that are seeping into the church world. People that have built up Empires to what they believe success is in the Christian world are toppling seemingly overnight. The old saying “Here today gone tomorrow” comes to mind. People that appear to have it all together with all the right looks, message and manner, are having the covers rolled back to reveal that they are only “human” with some real bad issues. I have grown weary of all the “form and fashion” that has entered into the church world. I just want to come together with other believers and worship the one true God!

I believe that all the kingdoms and idols that we have built up are coming down. We generally don’t like to hear this, (including me) but it’s true. God is so merciful that He is giving each of us a time and season to take inventory and correct these things ourselves. The Bible says that God is a jealous God and that He will have no other God before Him. But rather we’ve consciously done it or not, we have made other gods before Him and it is time to repent. It is time to trust the one and only God that holds our future…the merciful God…the just God.

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Can't Sleep?

I lift up my eyes to the hills—where does my help come from?
My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.
He will not let your foot slip; he who watches over you will not slumber;
indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.
The LORD watches over you, the LORD is your shade at your right hand;
the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night.
The LORD will keep you from all harm, he will watch over your life;
the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.
Psalms 121

It is 3:00 AM and I am fully awake. I’ve given the kitchen a good cleaning. I’ve even written notes to friends and prepared them to be mailed. It was while I was watering and misting the plants that it dawned on me: What in the world am I doing up this time of morning! True, I am an early riser, but not this early!

I glimpsed out the curtains and viewed the quiet sleeping world. I mean even the birds aren’t singing. That nagging mocking bird or whatever it is that I can hear as early as 5:00 every morning must be asleep too! I should go outside and make some noise to let it know how it feels to us humans huh? (smile)

It can be very lonely this time of morning. The quietness leads to deep thoughts and if not directed in the right way can lead to depression. I choose to begin to think on the good things like: God is with me and guess what? He’s not sleeping either! So whatever I’m doing right now He is right here with me! He’s not only my daytime friend but He’s my “after midnight when you can’t sleep” friend too!

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

I'm tired !

Why would you ever complain, O Jacob, or, whine, Israel, saying,
"God has lost track of me. He doesn't care what happens to me"?
Don't you know anything? Haven't you been listening? God doesn't come and go. God lasts.. He's Creator of all you can see or imagine.
He doesn't get tired out, doesn't pause to catch his breath. And he knows everything, inside and out. He energizes those who get tired, gives fresh strength to dropouts.
For even young people tire and drop out, young folk in their prime stumble and fall.
But those who wait upon God get fresh strength. They spread their wings and soar like eagles, They run and don't get tired, they walk and don't lag behind.
Isaiah 40:27-31 (The Message)

I am really tired today. It is manifesting as physical tiredness, but I believe that it is stress related. I am still in the learning process on how to completely turn things over to the Lord. And though I have come a long way, at times I find myself reverting back to my old way: Carrying the burden on MY shoulders. I mean we are clearly not made to carry issues and problems. I once watched a medical documentary on TV and they explained that the human body has recourse or remedy for every ailment except stress. We have antibodies, good bacteria, clotting and our immune system just to name a few ways God made our bodies to handle any invasion to our health. However when it comes to stress the body has no way of handling it, so what happens is the human body begin to “break down” in order to try and handle the stress. We are “fearfully and wonderfully made” indeed.

So if we are not made to handle stress then I have GOT to let it go and give it to God! I’m so glad that the Lord has a sense of humor (What am I talking about? He IS humor, He created it!) This is a true story, my son and his family was relocating to the West Coast and along the way several things happened; the RV broke down twice and when they went to the place they had arranged to live, the person changed their mind and they were basically left on the street! The latter problem was conveyed to me on the phone around 11:00 PM Eastern time (that means I was on the East Coast) After hanging up the phone I realized that there was absolutely nothing physically that I could do to help them. Just as I began to feel my self slip into the land of anxiety, the Lord showed me a “picture” in my head of me trying to balance a large U-Haul truck, a car, 2 adults and 2 children on my back! The scene I saw was so hilarious I burst out in laughter and laughed for a good 10 minutes. When I finally got myself together the Lord helped me to see that’s how ridiculous it looks to Him when we are trying to carry issues and problem. The issue with my son and his family worked out just fine, as we prayed and to the best of our ability at the time, turned it over to Him.

So why do I sometime lapse back to trying to carry these things? I dunno…is it a matter of trust? What ever it is I’m tired today I need your strength, so Lord I pray that You will help me to turn it all over to You, only You can carry it. Only You can fix it. Amen

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Ugly Duckling

Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
Philippians 1:6

Most of us know the story “The Ugly Duckling” written by Hans Christian Anderson. It’s a story of an egg that some how gets in the nest of a duck. The egg was unusual looking but the motherly instincts of the duck caused her to nurture it along with her duck eggs. The same was true when it hatched, the “duckling” that came out of the strange egg looked very different from the other ducklings. The mother duck continued to love and nurture this “ugly duckling” until one day she had to send him away out of the barnyard because of all the torment, taunting and rejection that he was suffering at the hands of the other barnyard animals.

To make a very long story short (or a little short, you know how I get carried away sometimes), the “duckling” suffered much rejection even in the outside world. Time past and it wasn’t until he was beginning to give up all hope when he stumbled onto the scene of a lake where beautiful Swans were swimming. As he got closer and the Swans noticed him, instead of receiving the taunts and rejection that he had become accustomed to, the Swans instead welcomed him into their midst. While swimming with these beautiful birds the “Ugly duckling” got a glimpse of his reflection in the lake and saw to his surprise that he himself had grown into a beautiful swan!

A literary critic once asked Hans Christian Anderson would he ever write his autobiography and he is reported as replying, “I did, it’s called “The Ugly duckling.”

So much of this fairy tale rings true of the way people may see us and the way God sees us. I know that in my own life most times I feel so inadequate. I have come a long way but there are still times that I question my importance and worth. We all have felt rejection and ridicule. We’ve been hurt and betrayed.
And I speak only for myself; I know I’m not an attractive person when compared to others. (Especially my feet, I have the strangest looking toes) If you think about it long enough, you can get depressed!
But that’s the key you don’t meditate on the negative things, you began to see yourself as God sees us. He sees us as a completed work. He sees us as His finished product. We just have to walk it out. We’ll go through the things mentioned above but if we stay strong, we’ll come out “looking” like what He has ordained for us to be, a victorious woman or man of God!
I Corinthians 13:11-13 says, “Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

Hold on, be strong, God is still working in our lives, we may not be yet what we will be, but we are no longer what we were! God is not finished with us! Be encouraged!

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Bird Watchin'

Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?
Matthew 6:26


To quote my sister, “Birds love your backyard.” She said this on a recent visit as she looked out my second story window. I take that very seriously coming from her. After all her years of bird watching she has a “trained eye” in spotting all kinds of birds. Her backyard in Virginia is a Bird and butterfly sanctuary. She has birdfeeders all among the trees and beautiful flowers planted through out. Gorgeous!

I on the other hand have a few trees and no flowers in my backyard. But I do see some kind of berry bush out there that a cardinal visits faithfully every winter. Don’t get me wrong, I like birds but I’m not an avid bird fan (especially since those “Cat birds” chased and attacked my then small son, dog and anyone that came into our backyard that summer!) My late husband had to resort to shooting a BB gun out the window in an attempt to scare them away…it didn’t work. Those birds ruled the backyard that year!
However yesterday I was looking out back and saw the most beautiful Blue Jay sitting out there on a tree limb. He was regal looking! I did not know how large and Blue these birds are!

After seeing that spectacular sight I have decided what will be my summer project. I plan to get a couple of bird feeders for the back yard. I will forgive those ol’ mean Cat birds and think of the beautiful Blue jay and all the other birds my sister saw out of my upstairs window. I think that I will enjoy doing some bird watching. They may not be as valuable to God as I am, but He sure did put a lot of detail in their making. And if He took the time to make them beautiful, I can take the time to watch!

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Breaking up the fallow ground

Sow for yourselves according to righteousness (uprightness and right standing with God); reap according to mercy and loving-kindness. Break up your (fallow) uncultivated ground, for it is time to seek the Lord, to inquire for and of Him, and to require His favor, till He comes and teaches you righteousness and rains His righteous gift of salvation upon you.
Hosea 10:12 (Amplified Bible)


On my way to work a couple of weeks ago, I noticed the farmland on either side of the road that I was traveling. The fields that were flat and void of any kind of crops all winter were now freshly plowed. The black rich soil had been turn upside down and it seemed every which way. The soil of these fields that had “rested” all winter, were now lumps and bumps of earth facing the rising sun…waiting.

About 2 weeks have gone by and I am on my way to work again and this time as I notice, the fields are now covered with rows of rich, green plants. And the scriptures above came to mind. Breaking up “fallow” ground as one-translation calls uncultivated ground is not an easy task. The days of the horse and plow are mostly over and in place are new machines that plow up the fields. But it is still a hard task. The ground that has been sitting dormant for several months is very hard to till.

Some of us have been through a season of spiritual “winter”, a wilderness if you will, of aloneness. Maybe you have questioned what is the meaning of your life, what is the purpose of it. Why are you here? Wondering if maybe God has forgotten about you or that maybe you’ve missed it somewhere along the way. You had such grand plans of the way things were supposed to be and somehow…it didn’t happen. We may not have understood it, but it is what it was. At times it may have felt that no one understood you or your pain, but you learned to live with it and here you are… you made it! Some of us made it by withdrawing, maybe not noticeable to others, but in your heart you withdrew from life, from hope. You covered it with a smile, put on a brave front. You went about your daily life status quo but a heart that was once full of hope became fallow ground.

When there came trials, or hardships, we just added it to the pile of hopelessness and sighed. But I believe that God uses these things to break up the fallow ground of our lives. It is not easy to go through these things, but God has a purpose. In order to “plant” a new harvest, the fallow ground must be broken and turned upside down and in and out (does that sound like what’s been happening to you?)

As the ground yielded to the farmer’s plowing and then the planting, the result was new growth. Do we want “new growth” in our lives? Do we want something fresh in God? Do we want all that He has to offer us in this lifetime? Then we too must yield to His breaking up the soil of our hearts that may have become hardened over time. We must ask Him to nurture and cultivate our hearts afresh so that He can bless us with His plans for our lives…lives with hope and yes joy!

Sunday, April 6, 2008

The Forgiveness of God

There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit. Romans 8:1

Years ago, a delightful couple began to attend the church at which I was a member at that time. They were from one of the Islands and both had dynamic, bubbly personalities. He was gifted as a musician and could play several instruments. His wife was very intelligent and did quite well in the business world. They were a real blessing to the church, not only to the areas of music and administration, but just for being wonderful people.

This couple was in their early to mid thirties and up until that time had been unsuccessful in having a child of their own. They had gone the whole medical route and had almost settled in their hearts that maybe God wanted them to adopt, when she got pregnant!
We were all so happy for them and rejoiced when their beautiful, healthy baby girl was born. What a testimony it was to God’s timing and faithfulness!

About a year or so later this couple informed us that the wife was diagnosed with breast cancer. Needless to say we were all devastated. She however was the example of strength and faith. The church was a wonderful support for them during this time and after surgery and treatments she seemed to be getting better.

Then one day she shared that she was once again pregnant. The doctors did not seem concerned about whether the baby that she carried would be affected by the treatments that she had, but were more concerned for her. She was told that the hormones that increase during a woman’s pregnancy actually act as a stimulant to cancer growth. The doctors said in order to save her, she must terminate the pregnancy.

This couple had become our friends. My late husband and I along with many other people in the church prayed for them in earnest. They were in a major predicament. We all know that it is wrong to abort the life of a child or anyone for that matter, but at the same time she wanted to live and be a mother to her daughter. Even now as I think of that time my heart flows with compassion for anyone that may be in that place.

Whenever I would talk to her, I did not “preach” to her about what is sin or not. I was not in her shoes and she knew herself what was right and wrong. But I would just let her talk of her heartbreak of this situation.

To this day I do not know what decision they made. Several months later while they were visiting at my house, I felt compelled to take her into the dining room away from the other people and talk to her. I shared the scripture above, and about how Christ does not condemn us. I felt in my heart to tell her that Christ loves her and that when we ask Him for forgiveness, He does. Tears were flowing and so were the words from my heart as I told her “The decisions that we make are not always the correct ones, but God is big enough to forgive us and cleanse us from ALL unrighteousness.”

I never asked her what decision she made about the baby and she never told me. They moved away from the area a short time later. Several months later I got in contact with her and a relative answered the phone and said that she was unable to take the call. A short time later she passed away.

I am so thankful for the faithfulness of God. You see it was none of my business what decision she made, that was between her, her husband and God. My only obligation was to be there and share with her God’s forgiveness. I know that she is in heaven right now.

God’s forgiveness is more than big enough to cover and cleanse us from ANY bad decisions that we have made. He willingly went to the cross and paid the price knowing (as He’s able to see ALL things) that we would make some bad mistakes, but He loved us anyway.

I am so thankful for His forgiveness, because I know that I would be so lost if He had not forgiven and continues to forgive me. His mercy does endure forever and are new every morning. All you have to do is ask and He will be there…He loves us so…

Please read the words of one of my favorite songs: “When God ran”


Almighty God, the great I am Immovable rock, omnipotent, powerful, awesome Lord Victorious warrior, commanding King of Kings Mighty conqueror, and the only timethe only time I ever saw Him run

CHORUS: Was when He ran to me, He took me in His arms Held my head to His chest, said “My son’s come home again” Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes With forgiveness in His voice He said,“Son do you know I still love you?” He caught me by surprise when God ran

The day I left home I knew I’d broken His heart And I wondered then if things could ever be the same Then one night I remembered His love for me And down that dusty road ahead I could see It was the only time – it was the only time I ever saw Him run

And then He ran to me, He took me in His arms Held my head to His chest, said “My son’s come home again” Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes With forgiveness in His voice He said,“Son do you know I still love you?” He caught me by surprise as He brought me to my knees
When God ran – I saw Him run to me

BRIDGE: I was so ashamed, all alone and so far away but now I know He’s been waiting for this day
I saw Him run to me, He took me in His arms Held my head to His chest, said “My son’s come home again” Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes With forgiveness in His voice I felt His love for me again
He ran to me, He took me in His arms Held my head to His chest, said “My son’s come home again” Lifted my face, wiped the tears from my eyes With forgiveness in His voice He said, “Son”, He called me Son He said, “Son do you know I still love you?” He ran to me and then I ran to Him When God ran

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Changing of the Guard

Behold, I will do a new thing, now it shall spring forth; shall you not know it? I will even make a road in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.
Isaiah 43:19


At Buckingham Palace it is with great ceremony when they change the guard. They march with complete focus and attention as they switch positions at the gate. I love the fancy uniforms and how you cannot distract them from the ceremony. They have been trained to receive and relieve the position of guard with dignity and decorum. When their “shift” is over they leave with as much pride and honor as the guard that’s coming on duty.

Years ago when my back patio was not enclosed and there was a big tree near it in the yard (since cut down), I was sitting there one fall morning and a wind blew and the leaves on that tree came off with a rustling sound. The Lord “spoke” to my heart and said, “I am moving like the wind and many will flow with me just as the leaves flowed with the direction of the wind.” When I “heard” that in my heart I looked in my neighbor’s yard and even though that same wind blew there, the leaves on their tree hung on and did not move. Before I could ask the Lord why, He spoke to my heart again, “many will be just as those leaves, the wind will blow but they will not move.” Though that has been many years ago, I still remember that as if it was yesterday. Most people do not like change. We get comfortable whether it is at work, home or play and when we have to move for some reason, it makes us angry and frustrated. But most of the time we find out later that it was for our good.

God is the same yesterday, today and forever. But God is also ever changing as far as working out the plans for our lives. We cannot put God in a box and think that we have Him down pat, when He’s already said that His ways are not our ways and His plans are not our plans. (Isaiah 55:9)

I was watching Christian TV this morning and saw how the late Jerry Falwell’s son whom is now the pastor, was handling the morning service. As I watched I was enthralled how Rev. Falwell’s son has taken the church services up to another level. Jerry Falwell was a strict Southern Baptist and he did a lot of good things, but his services were very subdued, borderline BORING. Now that his son is the pastor, this morning I saw people with joy clapping and singing. It was almost as if they had come alive! Now this does not mean that his father did not serve his purpose, but it was time to “change the guard” so that the son could take the people to another level in Christ.

In my humble opinion, in some churches the leadership hold on to their position beyond their time. Jesus lived His life as an example. He came, He taught the disciples and before he left, He charged the disciples to be fishers of men. To win people to Christ, train /disciple them, then release them (as Christ did) to become what God purposed them to be. The purpose may be to be a pastor as Jerry Falwell’s son or it may be to be the best public sanitation worker. Either profession puts you in the position to be salt and light in this world. And THAT is how we win the world to Jesus.

God’s purpose and plan will prevail. In these days He is doing something new. We can either go with the flow or become stagnant in our “comfort zone.”
In recent news constantly there has been the “unveiling” of scandal after scandal of leaders in the church, politics or business world. Is this a coincidence? No! I believe that God in His mercy gives each of us a time to privately repent, when we refuse to change our ways, in time it becomes a public matter. And we can either repent at that time in front of the world or just be embarrassed but continue in our ways. Some have chosen to continue as if nothing has happened. This is sad because God’s way will prevail in due season.

I think of Moses when after he had led the children of Israel through the sea and the desert. There came a time when God was to put Joshua to the forefront to lead the people across the Jordan River. Moses had fulfilled his purpose; God had used his life as a Jew and as a prince in the house of pharaoh to lead the people from bondage to freedom. But now it was time for war and Joshua was a warrior at heart. God knew what His people would be up against after they crossed the Jordan. So there was a “Changing of the guard” and the Bible says that Moses went up the mountain and to this day we do not even know where he was buried. Did that take away from Moses’ importance in God’s plan? Of course not! But there is a season and time for everything and it was time for Joshua to take the lead. (Numbers 27:12,15,18,22) (Deuteronomy 34:1-6)

My prayer is that as God moves among us, that I will remain teachable and willing to flow with whatever changes there may be. I don’t want to be so comfortable in my position wherever that may be, that I miss what He is saying or doing among us. The only real peace that exists is in His presence.

In these days and times let us “flow” with what the Lord is speaking to our hearts. His ways are sometimes mysterious, but His way is the only right way.

Friday, March 21, 2008

Shout with joy to God, all the earth! Sing the glory of his name; make his praise glorious!
Say to God, "How awesome are your deeds!So great is your power that your enemies cringe before you. All the earth bows down to you; they sing praise to you, they sing praise to your name." Selah! Come and see what God has done, how awesome his works in man's behalf!

Psalms 66:1-5

On one of my trips to the West coast during the Christmas holidays to visit my son and his family, they took me on a trip up the coast to a town right on the beach. I’ll never forget how beautiful the scenery was. At some point as we traveled it was clearly the ocean on one side and the mountains on the other. We stopped at the rest stops and admired the beautiful views. During the trip we also visited the Hearst Castle and even saw the elephant seals come up on the beach, it was awesome!

My son and his sweet wife had rented a beautiful home walking distance to the beach, in fact you could see the beach from the balcony off the main living area of the house. It is there that I sat early one morning with Bible in hand and inwardly speaking to the Lord about my life. So many things had changed for me personally as well as my family. We, my son, his wife and my grandchildren and I had all been through a series of losses and brokenness. As I sat admiring the view of the ocean and the mountains, smelling the early morning breeze, there was stillness in that moment. Out of the corner of my eye I saw movement. When I turned my head I saw the most beautiful deer, it was just a stone’s throw away from me. I watched it walk ever so cautiously and slowly and just hang out for a while. Too bad I didn’t have a camera. It was so close and kept profiling as if it was giving me my very own private show. The moments were somehow “Holy” and the deer’s actions said “Look at God’s beauty in me.” It was indeed a shining example of God’s magnificent creation!

After it left, I began to see that even in the midst of our pain and brokenness, God STILL has beauty. And if we trust Him with that pain and brokenness, He can make something beautiful out of it. We may not understand how He’s going to do it and when, but He’s our Father and He WILL. The verse in Romans 8:28 about God making all things work for our good is purely a trust issue, don’t try to figure it out, just give it to Him, He has a better view and can see all the parts that will fit together.

That is a trip that I will never forget. Seeing God’s beauty in nature in such a magnificent way let me see how much detail He put in it. And since we are more important to Him, then yes, He is interested in every detail of our lives.

As we celebrate this “Resurrection Day” let us remember that He Is Alive. He specializes in new beginnings and making all things beautiful!

Friday, March 14, 2008

This ol' World

He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you but to do justly, and to love kindness and mercy, and to humble yourself and walk humbly with your God?
Micah 6:8

You know what? There are some evil acting people in this old world. Some nasty acting people! And I must admit sometimes I’ve had it up to here (hand over my head) with these folks. As a Christian I know that I am to love unconditionally like it says in Corinthians 13, but I confess I don’t always hit it.

I recently was around some people that were continually instigating and prodding me to say bad things about other people. (I did not) They on the other hand were constantly gossiping and running folks down just as easily as you talk about the weather. I know that I am in this world and am a realist, but I was beginning to feel “ugly” and “nasty” being in this atmosphere.

It grieved me to see first hand just how evil and cruel the world can be. And of how I can be if I am not careful to follow the guiding of the Holy Spirit each day. The scripture above in context is about when Israel was asking what they could do to get back into God’s “graces”. They as a nation had been through a terrible time of persecution and you name it. And this is the answer, a very simple answer I might add. 1) Do justly, what is right, 2) to love mercy and kindness 3) and to humble yourself before the Lord. It sounds simple, but not always easy. But it is so necessary.

Being in that atmosphere made my flesh want to respond and not for the good either. But this scripture kept ringing in my heart, in fact it was a song that we used to sing years ago. I must do what is right, have kindness and mercy and humble myself before the Lord. After all He orders our steps and I was there for a reason. I may never know the reason, but He does and that’s good enough for me.

Lord help me to continue to be a light…

Monday, March 10, 2008

Don't be Anxious!

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7


Why do I worry about some of the silliest things? Stress is an awful thing and can affect your life and your body in various ways. I’ve been around for a while (I’m not that old) and still sometimes I feel like I’m lacking in the area of confidence.

Just this past weekend I had an eye doctor appointment and even though I see this guy regularly, I still get nervous when I go there. While he was checking my eyes he seemed to prolong the process. Then when he was looking over some test results, he hesitated and seemed to frown. Finally I could take it no longer and asked in a rather shaky voice “What’s wrong?” He gave me a rather rambling answer (or did it just sound like that to me?). I could actually feel anxiety creeping upon me. Finally when he repeated what he said, it was not as bad as I first perceived it.

I think that after going through all the Doctor’s appointments during my late husband’s illness, I have developed somewhat of a “white coat” phobia.
I’ve prayed about it, denounced it and rebuked it, and yet I can feel my self getting anxious each time I have a Doctor’s appointment. It is very frustrating and I know that I have to get the victory over this.

God has already given me the key in the scriptures above. He has given me everything that I need to have the victory. Starting today I will try my best to walk in peace.

Sunday, March 2, 2008

The Goodness of the Lord

I would have lost heart, unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.
Psalms 27:13

I can still remember it as if it was yesterday. My son along with his family was leaving to return to their home. This was about a month after my husband had died. I am eternally grateful of how my son and his dear wife were so helpful in taking care of all the arrangements for the funeral. I was in a fog and still cannot remember certain things about that time. But I remember clearly the day that they left, because it was one of the saddest days in my life. As I watched them leave, knowing full well that this was necessary, they had already given a whole month to be there for me. I still felt that I had no idea of what would become of me.

The only way that I can describe it is that I felt as if I would disappear from the earth never to be seen or heard of again. I guess that I felt swallowed up in grief. You see I had never really been alone before. I grew up with 4 siblings, Mom and Dad. While in college I had 2 roommates. Then when I married at a young age I had my husband and son. At no time had I ever lived alone.

After they left, I turned and entered the house and said to the Lord “It’s just You and me.” Now fast-forward over 6 years to now. It has been quite a journey; I’ve had my “firsts’ with lots of things. For instance my first blackout when all electricity went out in my neighborhood around 2:00 AM…scary! Or when my alarm went off in the middle of the night…scarier! I could go on and on but I was just thinking how good the Lord has been to me! Things that I thought I could never do, He has been with me every step of the way. Sure there were times when I felt like I could not go on, but that’s when I think of the scripture above, and I believe I AM seeing the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Sometimes I am in awe of how far He has brought me.

The Lord and I have become very close; in fact I’m really not alone, because He is with me ALWAYS!

Sunday, February 24, 2008

White as snow

Come now, and let us reason together, saith the LORD: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool.
Isaiah 1:18 (KJV)

I never will forget my very special friend Shirley; friends like her are one in a million. Her life, though not perfect, shone with the light of Jesus. She loved God and people and her generosity in every way is still a testimony of the love of Jesus Christ.

She had many trials in her life, one of them being the caregiver for a parent with Alzheimer’s disease. Though she had actual physical bruises from trying to handle the outbursts of a person with the symptoms of this disease, I never heard her complain. Instead she counted it an honor to be a servant of God in anyway. When she ushered at church she did it with a smile that made many people feel welcomed. Even when she spoke a word of correction, it was done in a way that made you feel that she really cared.

She suffered much in her young life. Even when sickness had ravaged her body and she was just a shell in appearance of her normal self, she still praised God for His goodness. I remember one snowy day, just weeks before she would go home to be with the Lord, a conversation we had on the phone. She said, “ I am looking out the window and see the pretty white snow.” She went on to say that “It reminds me of how Jesus took all my sins away and now when He sees me, He sees me as pure and white as that snow.”

Even in her final days on earth she was still giving God the glory for His goodness and salvation gift. What a testimony she was and is. I think of her often and especially when I look out the window and see the snow as I do today, I am reminded of Shirley and God’s goodness
.

Monday, February 18, 2008

Invest in a smile

”A merry heart makes a cheerful countenance.”
Proverbs 15:13a

The power of a smile is phenomenal. A smile can be something that you give and 99% of the time you’ll get one back. I love watching people, in fact sometimes I think that I may have missed my calling, I should have been a private investigator or an international spy. (smile) Because I’m really interested in people and their “stories”, I have fondly been accused of being an interrogator working for the government and a member of the FBI. Seriously though I am bold and will ask questions if I see an interesting person (I do this with tact of course). (smile)

It is very interesting to observe mannerisms, cultures and accents. It must be a family thing because for a fun pastime, I along with a couple of relatives can have a whole conversation in a foreign accent. Now with all this in mind, a few days ago I walked into a real Italian restaurant. Pirone’s (pronounced Pee-ro-nees) was down the street from the county Library where I was to return some books, so it seemed only natural that I would go there. When I entered I was met in surround sound of a tenor singing in Italian and though I could not understand a word he said, by the little “tear” in his voice it had to be about a long lost love that had broken his heart. (sigh) Italy was EVERYWHERE in the posters on the wall, the aroma of garlic in the air and EVERYONE spoke in Italian!

A very handsome young man changed his language quickly to English as I approached the counter to make my order. “Maya I helpa you” he said. His accent was so fluid as each word flowed into the next with that little singsong lilt to it. All the while you could hear the chefs and staff in the back yelling at each other in Italian. Well to me it sounded like yelling, they could have been just having a normal conversation for all I knew! Needless to say that I was very amused.

After scanning the menu it was a toss up between the Chicken Parmiagan and pasta or as a sandwich. The young man tried to describe the sandwich to me with many hand motions “Eet iza a larga portion of cheekin ona niza roll and it comes wida cheeps.” In case you didn’t get that he said, “It is a large portion of chicken on a nice roll and it comes with chips.” Got that? Anyway I settled on that and sat down to wait for my take out.

While I’m waiting some diners finished their meal and are walking out. As they are leaving the largest man hollers out “Hey! Mario ciao!”. He said it so loud it startled me. I promise you he sounded just like Marlon Brandon in the Godfather. And on top of that he had these two shorter men following him. I quickly got myself together and cordially gave them a smile (with a gulp) and you know what? Even with their rough looking exterior they smiled back as they went out the door. That gave me some confidence, okay here comes some more couples speaking in fluent Italian, the women look my way and I give them a smile…guess what? They smile back. Hey this is contagious. By now I’m smiling to myself because I’m thinking how awesome God is. Sure a smile is a small thing, but it makes you feel real good and it’s catching!

My waiter comes to the register with my sandwich, I pay him and say, “Thank you and have a great day” with a smile. As I’m turning to leave he says “You’ra welcome ana you hava gooda day too”…with a smile! Proverbs 17:22 says “a merry heart does good like medicine.”(a translation says that it is “good for the bones”) So in giving those smiles you are actually doing people a favor as it causes them to smile back at you!

So I feel like I got my full return on my investment of smiles that day. And on top of that the lunch was delicious especially the “cheeps” that turned out to be homemade kettle potato chips, which I devoured in the car on the way home!

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Love Never Fails

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.
I Corinthians 13:4-8a


Love never fails”, those are the words that my late husband always ended his cards and notes to me. After so many years of marriage, I came to expect those words at the bottom of the page; and I was never disappointed. I remember especially this time of year (Valentine’s Day) this fond memory because we were married on February 14th. My husband did not have the opportunity to be forgetful of our anniversary date, because it was Valentine’s day, with hearts, chocolates and greeting card commercials advertised in every store and on TV. And he did remember each year.

As we lived and grew together each year of our marriage, we learned what “Love never fails” really mean. The scripture speaks of patience, kindness, no envy, no pride, no rudeness and so on. I must admit we did not learn this all at once, like in the movies, but each day, each year we learned more and more what love really is. Love is more than hearts and flowers and violins playing, sometimes it can be painful and uncomfortable as you learn to surrender and love unconditionally. But it is truly worth it all. I believe that a husband and wife that truly love each other will continue to learn the love lessons until their very last breath. Only God knows all there is to know about a person. So as couples make a decision to have a successful marriage, they are continually learning about each other. And in that learning there comes a surrender and commitment to stay together.

Love is a wonderful thing and I thank God that I had the opportunity to experience it in my marriage. It was not always easy, but I would not trade those years for anything in this world. Because…Love never fails.

Sunday, February 10, 2008

His Mercy endures forever !

Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
Matthew 5:7

You know the Holy Spirit will be our own private tutor, if we let Him.
He gives personalized lessons on life when we allow Him to be a part of our everyday living. I can only sadly shake my head when I hear people trying to make God so mystical and in order to communicate with Him we have to be down right spooky!
NOT SO! God makes it simple because He knows how simple we can be! LOL
I love Him so much for being so understanding; I give Him all the praise.

I learned about mercy the other day in such a simple and profound way. I had only been to work for about a half an hour when several staff members came in the office to inform me that a student that was trying to park in a spot next to mine had hit and damaged my car. I imagined the worst, but when I got outside I saw that the only damage was some paint that had been scraped away from the bumper, one large and long spot and some smaller ones (estimated @ body shop as $493.00 to be fixed!)

The student that did the damage was walking away from the scene until a staff member eyeballed him to let him know that she had witnessed it. He still did not come to me. I had to call him out of class to get a report to our security officer. He was very nervous and asked that I not report it to his insurance company (this was his second incident in the parking lot). After hearing his request and then the angry remarks of some staff members to “Get him”; the Lord gently reminded me of an incident when I was guilty, and the person let me go “free”. I had not even thought of this incident in years, but God in the way that only He can do, brought it back to my mind without condemnation.

I knew what I had to do, even if it seemed crazy to those that I work with and the officer involved, I had to let him go. Now I know that this is not the answer in all cases, but for me, that day and that time, I know that I made the right choice. After I released it to God I felt such peace! I knew that God my father was proud of me.

Mercy is love and Love is mercy, you cannot divide the two. To love beyond ourselves is to love as God Loves. And as we give Mercy (love) we will receive Mercy (love).
This little act of kindness is nothing compared to what the Lord has done for us time after time. But thank you Lord, You are teaching me everyday how to love like You do.

Monday, February 4, 2008

Seeking Peace

Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee.
Isaiah 26:3

It is a very miserable feeling when you can't feel peace. And I have been feeling that way for a while. It is a foreign feeling for me, not unfamiliar, just a foreign feeling when it happens. I know what has happened, I have allowed the "trials of life" to overwhelm me. I have allowed bad memories and concerns to over take my mind and my joy. It is a very uncomfortable feeling, like wearing an ovesized, heavy coat on a sweltering summer day!

There is a story in the Bible when David is about to fight against Goliath the Giant and King Saul puts his armor on David to "help" him. When David discovers that the armor was way too big for him and that it would be cumbersome trying to fight with it on, he took it off. We all know what happens...David DID defeat the giant with only 5 stones and a sling.

I know that I am carrying a burden that I am unable to carry on my own. That is why I feel that I have no peace.
I know that I have to remove this burden and cast it on the Lord just like He told us to. Then and only then will I be able to fight the good fight of faith. And I have the Prince Of Peace, Jesus Christ....it is just that I have temporarily lost my focus on Him; looking instead at what I consider as problems.

I do not see how people do it; how they live without peace. I suppose that if you live that way for awhile it kind of grows on you. But I do not want to live that way. My prayer is that I will stay focused on the Prince of peace, who was chastised and paid such a heavy price for my peace. Forgive me Lord when I stray from being thankful for your great sacrifice so that I could walk in peace...


Monday, January 28, 2008

In Honor of my late husband

But I would not have you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning them which are asleep, that ye sorrow not, even as others which have no hope.
For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so them also which sleep in Jesus will God bring with him.
For this we say unto you by the word of the Lord, that we which are alive and remain unto the coming of the Lord shall not prevent them which are asleep.
For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trump of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first:
Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord.
Wherefore comfort one another with these words. 1 Thessolonians 4:13-18


January 29th marks the sixth anniversary of my husband's passing from death into eternal life. Though it has only been six years, at times it feels like it's been longer and sometimes it feels like it happened yesterday. I still miss him more that I can even put into words.

My husband and I knew each other since junior high school. I think what attracted me to him was his determination, even at a very young age. He had lost both parents at an early age and pretty much made up his mind that he was going tp have a successful life, regardless of the tragedies that came to his young life.

We were married for over 31 years when he passed away and thought that we would grow old together, but this was not to be. God in His infinite wisdom and soveriegnty had a different plan. And He is tenderly helping me to walk in His plan. It has not been easy, but God is faithful and loves me so very much.

I honor my husband today. If he was here with me now he would be the first to say "I am not perfect", so I do not make him to be a perfect human being (as some tend to do when a person passes on). But I do say this, he was a wonderful husband to me. He took care of me, was concerned for me and provided for his family as a man of God should. One of the things that I miss the most is having him around to share my concerns with, talking to him always made me feel so much better.

I know that he would want me to go on and live this life that God has given me. So I honor my husband by loving, trusting and obeying the God that he trusted in to the very last second that he was on this earth.
Thank you husband dear for your love and example of a true man of God.

Saturday, January 26, 2008

I am persuaded

For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,
Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39


“…firmness of character, a woman that knows her mind, without timidity or feebleness of purpose. Nor a weak spirit that is easily persuaded and cannot be relied upon.” This was the line spoken by Captain Fredrick Wentworth, a character from Jane Austen’s book “Persuasion”. I love Jane Austen’s and the Bronte’ sisters books, they were women that lived in a era when women were considered very low on the totem pole if they were not from a family of wealth and married or engaged at least by the age of 20. Basically a woman should be “seen and not heard”, so these brave women wrote their messages of the unfairness of this sort of class-ism into their novels, wrapped their intolerance of the treatment of women of that time around characters that captured the people of that day as well as hundreds of years later.

The heroine of “Persuasion” a plain, spinster of 27 years old, Anne Elliot, is at a dinner where Capt. Wentworth is also attending. It is there where he makes this speech about the kind of wife he would like to have. You see Anne was persuaded 8 years earlier by interfering relatives and acquaintances to break her engagement to the Capt. Wentworth because he had no money or position. They both were brokenhearted by this decision that Anne made and since that time neither have married. Now 8 years later the Captain returns, wiser, richer and of high position. He and Anne still yearn for each other, but at this point he is still angry with her for being so easily persuaded to “dump” him 8 years earlier. So he states the line above at the dinner table making her think hmmmmm.

This line he spoke made me think “hmmmmm” too. Wow, firmness of character, know your mind, no timidity or feebleness of purpose, not being weak or unsure of myself. To be determined about what I believe and want and not changing when a wind comes and blows the opposite direction. HMMMMMM indeed! Isn’t that what God wants for me??? Isn’t that what I want for me??? Through out the Bible there are scriptures that say these same things. God wants us to be strong, confident, no fear and determined in whom and what we believe and not to be easily swayed from that.

The character Anne finally sees the error of her weaknesses and yes there is a happy ending. And what about my story? Well I will say this, my desire and focus is to be a strong, determined woman of God; knowing who I am in Christ and persuaded and led only by His Holy Spirit.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

We can count on Him

The LORD will command His lovingkindness in the daytime,And in the night His song shall be with me— A prayer to the God of my life. Psalms 42:8


Oh how I needed to read this. There is something so comforting about God’s Word especially when you are going through transition. Being a widow is a big transition for me. It’s the kind of thing that no one can tell you about how to go through, you just have to press in and go through yourself.

I was driving to work the other morning and along the way I saw the fields that once were green and overflowing with all kinds of grain, including corn. Now they stood barren with no sign of life. That scene along with the morning fog, painted a gloomy, austere picture. It reminded me of what it is like in life sometimes…some seasons. There are times when you go through a dry, desolate place, when you feel as if no one could have possibly come this way before. But it is in those times that I am reminded that as surely as the fields will be filled again to overflowing with lush green plants, so the dry season of my life will pass and I will “bloom” again.

I believe God allows those times of desolate and barren feelings, so that when our season change, we can remember and comfort those around us that maybe going through their times of dryness.

God reminded me this morning that He commands His loving-kindness to me. You hear that? He COMMANDS me to feel His love and kindness, no matter what I am going through. He does not ASK me to feel His love and kindness, The dictionary defines command as to direct with authority, to order. So God directs and orders me to feel and know His love And even at night, sometimes the loneliest time, His song will be with me! What kind of song does God sing? Just the kind you need to let you know that it’s going to be alright.

We must press in to His love and kindness that will sustain us through each day of our lives. He will never leave us nor forsake us…we can count on Him.