Giving Honor

‘Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, that your days may be long, and that it may be well with you in the land which the Lord your God is giving you." Deuteronomy 5:16


I wrote this article back in 2004, it was published in the county newspaper. It still holds true today...

My mother's positive influence in my life has helped me so much in the past years. Through many events and phases in my life I have the blessing of remembering how my mother handled herself through some of the same experiences. Whether it was child rearing as a young mother, parenting a teen, experiencing an empty nest, caregiving for a sick husband and even widowhood; my mother’s example stood as worthy footsteps to follow. She poured into us all that she had and with God’s strength she did it to the best of her ability.

Each time that I reflected, "How did Mom handle this?" I remembered that she was strong, resilient and determined.
Strong through sorrow, resilient through trials and determined to live her life to the fullest.

My mother did not have an easy childhood, she grew up in a small southern town as the daughter of sharecroppers during the late 1920's and the 1930's. The south was deep in segregation at the time and life for her family was hard in so many ways; and yet with all that she experienced, she never allowed it to deter her from becoming a woman of distinction and character. She married young and became a stellar wife and confidante to my father. It may be understandable to use your negative childhood experiences as an excuse for not living a positive lifestyle as an adult, but my mother used her experiences as a "ladder" to take her higher where her dreams could be fulfilled. Her childhood experiences were hard, but she made a choice as a child to have a better life. By making that choice with God’s help, she nurtured and encouraged us as a family to succeed in life.

She never allowed me nor my siblings to ever feel that we were less in

some way to anyone. She taught us that we could do or be anything that we wanted to be if we tried hard enough and that we, ourselves were the only people that could keep us from achieving our goals.

She encouraged in us good esteem that gave us the ability to be comfortable in the presence of all people, no matter what race, level of wealth, education or social status. We were God's creations and in His eyes there is no special preference.

The love of a mother is a wonderful thing. Throughout history, many mothers have given up their own happiness, careers and even their lives for their children. Whether if it was during the years of slavery in America, the Holocaust in Europe; on every continent and from times past until now, there are stories of women that sacrificed for their children. These were mothers who by the Grace of God were able to gather the strength during great trials to protect and preserve what they believed to be precious and priceless.

Some of you reading this may say, "Well I never knew my real mother." or "I never experienced a mother's love." Well look at it this way, the fact that you are alive to think that thought is proof that you had a mother that loved you enough to give birth to you. The situation surrounding your birth may not have been ideal, but you're here! You couldn't get here by yourself...someone thought enough of you that they carried you inside their body for 9 months, and endured the pain of delivery. There was another option, but they chose not to go that route...and here you are! Praise God!

No matter the circumstances of your conception, your biological mother chose to give you the ultimate gift...life. Surely that is something to thank God for.

My precious Mom went home to be with the Lord February 2000, and I miss her so much. She was a loving wife, mother, grandmother, sister, aunt and friend. She loved and honored her parents and taught us how to honor our elders and to show respect to all people. On the day of her funeral, so many people came by to give their condolences, people of all races, social and economical strata.There were many tears and stories, but one thing in common, they all said that she was their "Friend". She was always there to listen, to hug, to encourage and to love...she let her light shine!

This year (2004), 4 years after the passing of my beloved mother, I adopted a Mom. I firmly believe that women should have a least one elder and one younger female friend...to me it just brings about balance in life. We can both learn from as well as deposit into both friends. It's a win win situation.

This precious elder woman that I adopted lived in a nursing home for many years and seldom had any visitors, because her only daughter lived many states away. My visits to her may have seemed as if I was there to encourage her, when in fact she was the one that encouraged and comforted me.

For about six months we would laugh and talk together and when I would leave the nursing home, I felt somehow that the void of not having my mother was filled. Eventually her daughter made arrangements for her to come and live with her and that season was over, but I will never forget how the Lord put me and my adopted Mom together. I needed a Mother's love and God in His mercy fulfilled that need.

This Mother's Day, if your Mother is alive, cherish and honor her. If you never knew your biological mother, reflect on how blessed you are to have been given the gift of life. If your Mother has passed, remember her love and count yourself as blessed to have had her for the time that you did.

My Mother ran the race and has passed the torch to me, may I be faithful to God's calling to be a light in this dark world, to be a mother, grandmother, sister, aunt and friend that listens, hugs, encourages and love with the love of the Lord.